Monday, November 1, 2010

The Great Indian Jugaad



Jugaad – "An arrangement or work around used because of lack of resources", this is how my dictionary describes this tribute of that almighty to we Indians.
I’ve often thought, at the same time, felt bizarre about the great trait among Indians of ‘getting things done’- howsoever inputs we need to put in or how perfunctorily we are to accomplish the given job at hand. We’ve become perfectionists at shenanigan, masters of hoax & probably the best ‘MANAGERS’ whenever it comes to any form of superficial management, what we ‘DESI-ly’ call ‘JUGAAD’. :P
Being an Indian, needless to say, this one-of-its-only-kind feature is incepted within me, innately. Amid last ENTRU-MEET, I, myself et al were the incumbent event heads of one of the many events. The stereotypical first round saw straightforward political questioning. The round witnessed just another presentation of, quite handy, ‘JUGAAD’ in order to get idea about the respective answers, thanks to super co-operative competitors in ambience the teams were with & needless to mention, the advancements in the gadgetry science. The second round passed by smoothly without much mess wherein the teams were to bandy about their election manifestos before the Junta.
Then came the 3rd & final round which, according to course of action, was to be assessed by one of our much revered faculty members. We hadn’t so much as expected the forthcoming glitch, courtesy-undue irresponsibility of Sri H& N@!%, who rocked the boat & backed out on the very last minute from judging over the event due to his purported ‘personal’ reasons.
Lo & behold!!! Sri N@!% had already chickened out on us & there we were, left to become scapegoats. With less than 15 minutes for the scheduled start & not a single deserving person in the offing, I had already started getting hallucinations about my colleagues taking poignant jibes at my super incompetency in event management. Next, what I could recall is someone proposing under his breath to pack up & furtively escaping the scene to spend next few weeks as fugitives (better burying our heads down somewhere in the ground). :P.
After a while, shunning the panic, some churning of heads & having had a concise talk with the conveners-there it was, the X-factor, the Jugaad. Ya Basta!! We had ‘managed to’ procure, just in time, even more notable personality as our about-to-be judge, Mr. Sankalp Mittal (CAT-2008, AIR1, for the matter of fact). In the end, all event heads were out of the woods. For once, the Jugaad had worked.
I equate the instance with just another high profile event, which I have an exact notion about, that possesses this exclusive characteristic of Jugaad-ment (read management) – the CWG.
“What is common between CWG committee & students?”
Ans- Both start their preparations at the11 hour. :P, this was yet another wisecrack at the CWG before they actually started.
To be very honest & leaving sentiments apart, the offbeat preparations for the games were never up to the mark, incessantly missing each & every deadline (without fail). Potholes flooding with water with just extra downpour, that too in the vicinity of main venue, bridges crashing to dust, games-village ‘white-washed’ with pan stains, ‘ultra hygienic’ washrooms (that often invited nausea from the officials visiting on routine checks), squalor of the cattle left unattended – these are just a few of a plethora of blunders one cannot overlook. I happened to read in TOI about some ‘wise men’ working-to-save-India’s-skin, audaciously trying to drag the top brass of CWG committee into public, asking them to declare an apology for their insolence in projecting a tainted semblance of India. (Personally speaking, if I were there, I’d be pro-‘ANTI-CWG’ mission too.)
The era before the games had almost everything to sufficiently mar an event on a scale like this, with media playing spoilsport, adding fuel to the fire, nonstop, with its constant bitching about the glitches & hitches in CWG preparations. Adding to the misery, with his worsening by the minute situation, was Suresh Kalmadi & his never ending hunger for rebuke from authorities higher to him. In a nutshell, the games were set to prove an ignominious disaster for India’s figure. It seemed a far cry for India to accomplish the games gloriously or just to launch them prosperously. A handful looked sanguine about the odds.
In spite of all controversies & loopholes in preparations, India ‘Jugaad-ed to’ (read managed to) showcase a spectacularly marvelous opening ceremony that proved just enough for the world to stare unflinchingly at what lay in store & was yet to be delivered. Why just the opening ceremony? The games, as a package proved a boon for India. Right from the beginning, India delivered or ‘managed to’ deliver the quality that, by no means, was inferior to international parameters one bit. At the end of day, India ‘managed to’ defy all prophecies of doom. “INDIA UNLEASHED-WITH VEHEMENCE” became almost every newspaper’s headline.
I stumbled upon an athlete’s blog while browsing through internet that mentioned the tacky conditions not more than 30 days before starting of the games. She describes the preparations “India is a mess, utter chaotic. Prevailing conditions seem to be totally pathetic & pitiful as hordes of cows, buffaloes, stray dogs & god knows who else stroll through roads & sidewalks with pride.” Wait, I haven’t concluded yet. This was her description about the scene on her maiden visit 30 days before the start off. She comes back, now her 2nd visit to actually participate in ‘CWG-DELHI 2010.’ “Swoosh!!! No single cattle, no single beggar traverses my sight. The condition, surprisingly, seems absolutely almost perfect!! Almighty! How could anyone ‘manage to’ swallow up the mishmash & vacate it with such neat, that too in such a short time?” The answer is simple-Who else but the great INDIAN JUGAAD.
I’ve used ‘managed to’ repeatedly above, since I feel it ain’t an elite level of management quality (a positive remark in itself) that we possess, but undoubtedly an excellent height of ‘JUGAAD’ (an ostentatious feature ultimately leading to buy out positive remarks, one way or the other).
To the world outside - The plight of India had been over turned. India now looked forward to bidding seriously for 2020 Olympics. By far, 2010 CWG proved out to be yet another star in India’s shining theory (inappropriate outlay of funds left apart).
The Jugaad had worked, yet again. 
To conclude, I’ve realized why Indians make such astute ‘Jugaadus’ (‘managers’, to sound more sophisticated, for the human race outside :P). As far as it goes, we still can count on this innate, cliquish, proficient & very handy trait of our own – Jugaad.
The article has become possible only because of the one who bequeathed the INFRA responsibility for MB11 to me, justifying “Infra head to koi jugaadu hi hona chahiye.” :P

Sunday, June 6, 2010

'SACH' is God


I pen down today, especially for which I had been longing for over 2 months to write about what, in India is considered no less than a god, truly a much revered entity. In Hindu mythology, we start with some coveted work by paying homage to Hindu gods. I, myself being a Hindu, the ritual (or tradition whatever you call it) am bound to follow it. Since the upcoming post is going to be my first article, I bow down & start with the ‘god’ itself. . . . . .

24th Feb 2010, Wednesday
Exactly 2 months before the day I (or probably thousands of you) watch as ‘cricket day’ or ‘Sir’ Sachin Tendulkar’s birthday. . . . . . . .
We all are flocked at our SVNIT canteen. Me along with Raja, Dugs, Paul & Dhall & I don’t know how many have grabbed a couple of messed up front row seats. We have nothing to do but to curse ourselves for having missed one-and-a half century of the ‘God’. But there is a relief, or a kind of stress surging within, for there is a new record of all time in the offing . . . . . . . . . still nearly 10 overs to spare & the ‘God’ still clobbering & bamboozling the Proteas with his exclusive technique of stroke playing.
We join the bash when the ‘God’ is 169* at the crease. I had just gone over the counter to have samosas & by the time I return ……..wham!!!!! the ‘God’ has already slogged a four & a six off Van de Merve (although ‘slog’ wont be the most appropriate term for him as he seamlessly blends his nondescript power with his picture perfect & austere technique to make one of the most blissful things to watch on this planet earth – his strokes……..:)). The ‘god’ has set crowd abuzz. The tension has started building……as the ‘God’ reaches 179*……..
Within the next over or two our canteen is holding the capacity 8 times you usually see even in its peak hours. The cheering & rooting from SVNITians takes over the commentary & all that is audible now are whistles of varied frequencies, beating of bottles, tables & anything our vandalizing friends could find. After pilfering a couple of singles & doubles, the ‘God’ catches up 191*.
Wayne Parnell is brought into attack. . . . . . the ‘God’ slices it towards fine leg, gets 2 more…….193*…
Now I can see even the girls going gaga. Unsurprisingly, everybody at SVNIT (or better in India) knew the highest individual score in ODIs. Without much of impending drama, on the very next delivery, the ‘God’ runs a double…..195*……….. all & sundry are in a state of paranoia, I could see the final yearites dancing with the smaller ones (or batkes) on their shoulders clasping their legs making it a real ‘pagalkhana’. Some people from the back manage to get a few cans, beating them continuously in a rhythm. For once, I could not stop myself from getting on to my feet. I start with the dancing party & follow with the same craziness. Truly, if this record was to be broken, ever, it had to be no other man but ‘Sir’ Sachin.
The ‘God’ is on the crease – 195*. . . . . .off just 140. . . I see his whole body cramping, but somehow I hunched he’d never get a runner running for him (let me remind you Saeed Anwar had a runner for most of his innings (194) which remained the top individual score for years) as his stubbornness & juvenility towards the game is not hidden from anyone, & as expected he keeps running on his own, digesting the suffering with only a slightest of wrinkle over his forehead.
Another few singles . . . . the ‘God’. . . . . 199*
The gaali session :-
The ‘God’ is just a run away from rewriting the history books with 14 balls in the innings. . . .
47.5 over - Dhoni sends him back, no run. More aggression, voices simmering at the back. . .
47.6 over - Dhoni gets a single, keeps the strike. Someone loses temper from the crowd, starts cursing Dhoni in a language which I later found was probably Telugu. (these Annas, they don’t spare anyone :))
48th over - the next over portrayed Dhoni as a villain, not like the ones we have in Bollywood, but a true life villain, a devil with cynical motive as he kept strike for hell one complete over overlooking the fact that the ‘God’ is just 1 run away from getting 1st double ton in one-day-internationals.
Now, not even I was daunted, but the plethora of people around me started derogatory slangs for Dhoni. For a moment, it took me hard to digest if he was the same Dhoni whom Indians had throned atop for the past few years !!!!! “Then why the hell this bloody moron ain’t giving strike to him!!!”, someone blurted furiously from behind as Dhoni retained strike for the final over.
49.1 over- Dhoni hits a six. Now it was one of the most dramatic moments in my cricketing career as a spectator, I mean, you don’t get to see an Indian player being flaked, & that too in India for hitting the ball into the stands !!!! it was all happening here. . . now I literally heard one of the final year madams bursting out “kutte, kamine, saale strike de naa” I almost broke into laughter. :)
49.2 over- Dhoni again slaughters the ball to deep mid-wicket, but thanks to South Africa having such an elite fielding side, for Hashim Amla diving & saving the ball running for the boundary even with his fractured hand. Finally (& fortunately), after what it seemed a year long wait, the ‘God’ gets the strike.
All cheer, in between the bowler starts his run-up, more enthusiastic shouts, sound becomes deafening, rhythmic claps, tables turned into drums with incessant beating, even girls squeaked louder, straining their vocal chords to the maximum, probably for the first time in their lives. . . canteen-jam-packed, people climbing over each other, even Shekhar bhai (our canteen manager) had left his counter & has come right in front to witness history in-the-making & that too among such a lively & rocking public . .(high-five to SVNITians :)). The bowler completes his run-up & delivers the ball . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . & that’s it. Ya Basta!!!!!, hurraaayyyy!!!!! yahooooo!!!!! reverberates all around. . . . . the ‘God’ plays it towards point region & manages to steal a single, the history being created. Sachin Tendulkar,the first man (oops! Did I just call him a man????) in the history of cricket,on this planet to score a double hundred in an ODI.
It’s like the happiest moment for all of ‘God’s’ bhakts. It feels like the ‘God’ himself has swayed a magic stick & tamed his preachers. Undoubtedly it is the happiest day of my life too (being his big time bhakt) that I involuntarily treat a few of my friends (surely of over excitement, as you never expect such a thing from a miser like me :)). The atmosphere turns into a true heaven.
Present day-
I recall the negative flake & discouragement which he had to face, a few time back for having out of form just for a couple of months (in his 21 year marathon long career) that even some of cricket prodigies including Ian Chappell dared commented publicly asking him to retire. It’s my request & I’m not asking too much to these ’prodigies’ (including millions of free-advice-givers in India) to at least think once before you speak anything against the living ’God’, as even Rama & Krishna did commit mistakes in their lives. Then how this hyper-astute yet down-to-earth ‘God’ be spared of such small mistakes for failing to entertain one million people of India during such a little time !!!

Long live ‘Sir’ Sachin !!!

EPILOGUE-
“There are two kinds of batsmen in the world. One - Sachin Tendulkar, two - all the others.”
-Andy Flower
Commit all your sins when Sachin is batting. They will go unnoticed because even the God is watching.
-A hoarding in England

“I have seen god. He bats at no. 4 in India.”
-Matthew Hayden
India me aap Prime Minister ko 1 baar katghare me khada kar sakte hain par Sachin Tendulkar ko nahin”.
-Navjot Singh Sidhu
Tuzhe pata hai tune kiska catch chhoda hai.”
Wasim Akram to Abdul Razzak when the latter dropped Sachin’s catch in 2003 WC.

Friday, April 9, 2010

I'm a blogger, finally :)

Friday, 9th of april '10
....the day has arrived when i've (finally) gotten a medium to surface my thoughts,to express my views which have been simmering somewhere inside one of the dungeons lying between my mental desires & literary incapabilities. Today, i hold the pen to break the threshold which had restrained me of 'writing' since when. Finally, its time to break free, my inside soul keeps telling me....it feels much buoyed & light-hearted as if year-old shackles have started to dissolve....

Unlike my other 'BLOGGER' friends for whom this 'hobby' had just sprouted out in just matter of moments, on the contrary, for me it followed a genuine algorithm. The primer, if i have to state one would definitely be the umpteen,incessant inspiration from my dad to write 'something'. It is this 'something' which, through times, has percolated my soul and pinched me to fare with 'writing'....(and once you start thinking in the right direction, words involuntarily start dancing in your upper part.....hell, i delayed a lot in just thinking about this.. ...) Thanks a lot daddy to inherit in me this cult feeling of writing ... For if you hadn't pursued, I'd never even thought about doing such a thing....:)

So, dear you all, here I am, expounding my stories and experiences to you & only you people......in my posts coming......do read 'em and like 'em .... :) n please don't forget to pin your precious comments on this blog of mine....